Heartbreak is a universal experience that comes with intense emotional anguish and distress.

While many people associate a broken heart with the end of a romantic relationship, therapist Jenna Palumbo, LCPC, emphasizes that “grief is complicated.” The death of a loved one, job loss, changing careers, losing a close friend — all of these can leave you brokenhearted and feeling like your world will never be the same.

At some point in our life, we experience heartbreak. May it be the end of a romantic relationship with an ex, your special someone cheated, or the person you truly love cannot reciprocate your love, ending a friendship with a friend, and many more. There are many reasons you can get heartbroken, but there are also many ways to mend it. 

Heartbreak and pain happen because you give love, and being in love is one of the best emotions in the world. No one commits to a relationship with the hopes of getting heartbroken. But you don’t know what the future holds. Being in love means taking the risk of being heartbroken. There can be feelings of anger, confusion, grief, loneliness, or sadness. 

All you have to do is pick up yourself, keep going, stay strong, and re-learn the process of how to trust again. So if you’re reading this article because you recently got heartbroken, you’re a step in the right direction. Heal emotionally and mentally with these ways on how to mend a broken heart. 

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Acceptance is the First Step

The first step to getting over a break-up is acceptance and accepting things the way they were. Accept that the relationship with someone you love has ended, and it’s time to move on. It may be brutal to hear this but, stop fantasizing about the thought that you can get back together, or this is just a phase, or you are on a temporary break. 

How can you move on if you live with a mindset with your partner’s hopes coming back? If you think you did your part and best to fix the relationship, but it’s getting nowhere, try to accept the situation. It won’t be easy; you can be in denial, but eventually, as time passes, you should try to accept it. 

Forgiveness

As you try to accept the break-up slowly, try to forgive. Whether you’ve been cheated on or left hanging on a thread, be the bigger person and try to forgive. If you’re the one who is at fault for why the relationship ended, forgive yourself too. When you learn to truly figure, you’ll feel like a chip is coming off your shoulder. The burden will be lighter; the pain will be lesser. Of course, you may never forget that part of your life, but at least try to forgive. 

Be The Better Person and Forgive

With all the tears and heartache, try to stay positive. They say everything happens for a reason, and maybe this person is not meant for you. Maybe greater things and a better partner are destined for you. Start believing in yourself that positive changes are coming into your life, be kind to yourself after the break-up. 

Do Not Avoid the Pain

The worst thing you can do after heartbreak is to avoid the pain. Suppression is a defense mechanism where a person blocks or avoids heartache; it is unhealthy. Face your pain, cry, vent, do not hide your feelings. If you cry as much as you can, the sooner you’ll get over the heartbreak. When you remember the fun memories, it may hurt. If you see some of the photos of your ex, it can make you cry. That’s perfectly normal for all people, and it’s not a sign of weakness. It’s a brave step in moving on. 

Take Time to Heal: Take It One Day at a Time

Relationship experts say they say all heart wounds are healed by time, so take time to heal one day at a time. The healing process is not easy, and everything may not seem to go back to normal. But take it one day at a time, and eventually, everything will be okay. Some people may heal faster; for some, it will take time, there is no deadline, but time will heal. 

End the Connection

Cut the connection if it’s easier for you to get over the heartbreak. Unfollow or unfriend your ex on social media, also avoid trash-talking and posting bad things about your ex on social media. Delete his/her phone number not be tempted to stay in contact. Finally, avoid social gatherings that you may bump into your ex-lover. 

HOW ABOUT FOR DIVORCED PARENTS?

The situation may be different for divorced couples who have kids because you need to communicate to co-parent your kids. At first, try to have a mediator or a middle man when you communicate, and if everything is okay, maybe you can stay as friends in the future. 

Go Out and Socialize

The feelings after a break-up include loneliness and sadness. So don’t sulk at home, go out and socialize, spend time with your friends, meet new people, visit new places, travel. Spending time with your support system and talking about your feelings is emotional venting, and it is healthy after a heartbreak.

Share What You Feel With a Trusted Person

It’s easier to get over a heartbreak when you share your feelings with a trusted person. You can have your best friend come over to your house over a bottle of wine and just talk. Having a trusted friend or family by your side, who knows you well, can help you through this challenging situation. 

CALL YOUR BEST FRIEND

You know you and your best friend are going to be there for each other no matter what. Your best friend or a family member can give you advice on how to move forward. You know they will be there for you no matter what. But remember to avoid talking about your innermost feelings about your ex to someone who is dismissive and who puts off the topic. When you’re not feeling any empathy, set limits. 

Keep Yourself Busy

The next step to not overthink the situation is to keep yourself busy. After all the crying and emotional roller coaster, it’s time to get out there and spend your time wisely. Enroll yourself in the gym, find a new hobby, take time to travel, go outdoors, do something you’re passionate about, spend time with your family. This may sound like a cliché; many people do this after a break-up with an ex. Keeping yourself busy can make you feel great. Who knows? Maybe you can meet new friends or perhaps be back on track in the dating world. If you’re busy all the time, you won’t have time to think about your ex. 

Love Yourself

Now that you have all the time in the world start taking care of yourself. How can you give love to your next relationship if you don’t know and love yourself? You have given love to your ex all this time. It’s time to love yourself. Self-love must be a priority. A boosted self-esteem and self-confidence will follow. 

HOW CAN YOU LOVE YOURSELF?

Take care of your health, exercise, eat healthily, pamper yourself with relaxing massages. When you start taking care of yourself, you will feel emotionally and mentally happy. If you just recently got heartbroken and did not take care of yourself, it will take a toll on your mental health. Do not allow this heartbreak with your ex to get the best of you. There are many new people you can meet that are far more wonderful.

Write Down What You Feel In a Journal

If your feelings are starting to overwhelm you, start a journal to vent out your feelings. Perhaps you can write a song or poem, start a blog, plan out your life goals out of this heartbreak. They say that the greatest songs come from feelings of love lost because the emotions after a break-up are so strong and real. When you resort to journaling, it helps you clear your head to fix your problems and soothes your tensions. Some people use their journals as a life goal list, and you can do that too.

Do Not Resort to Drinking 

It’s okay to have occasional drinks or party with friends, but do not use alcohol or recreational drugs to escape your feelings. Substance abuse is never the answer; in fact, it will make things worst. Furthermore, it is a recipe for disaster if you’re resorting to these unhealthy habits after a break-up. 

Make Someone Smile

It may be odd, maybe you’re asking, how can making someone smile help me get over a heartbreak? Simple, if you’re having a bad day, and things may not go your way, making someone smile can make you smile too. Isn’t it the best feeling in the world when you see someone laugh because of you? This feeling of happiness is contagious, and it can uplift your mood too. So smile at a stranger, surprise a special someone, do good deeds, be kind to everybody you meet, share happiness and positivity.

Use the Heartbreak as a Lesson

They say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, and that life’s best lesson is a broken heart. Use this heartbreak as a lesson, and it is one way to be a better person. What can you learn from this experience? How can you avoid getting a broken heart in the future? How do you approach your future relationships? Do you need to improve something in yourself to be a better partner? Re-evaluate your likes and dislikes in a relationship. It is best to write down these questions and answer them in your journal. As you try to reflect, you’ll learn new life lessons.

Source : kentuckycounselingcenter.com